Tucker, the Sith Lords, and the Trouble with Agreeing Too Hard

And introducing Comrade Jabba

Propaganda only works when the person doesn’t know he’s getting propagandized. If you, like me, find yourself pumping your fist while listening to Tucker, just remember: “they” are probably steering you like a parent steering his adult imbecilic child through a crowded train station.

We’ve come to a point where everything in the news is either execrably loathsome like a Mamdani grocery store that defies the natural laws of economics or execrably fabulous that defies belief like Carlson’s Ten Points. The populace is shattered, its back broken over the reality knee that was Covid: there is an Epstein class and it eats at the French Laundry while restricting everyone else to McDonald’s drive-thru and it trades on the inside and bangs minors and leaps off the average man’s back to give each other high fives because they’re so smart and talented . . . and not because they do things to get ahead that the rest of us won’t do because we’re not, you know, becrusted pieces of shit.

And for all we know, it’s been doing so for a hundred-plus years, and it’s so deep and insidious, anyone--like Tucker--who claims to plumb its depths must also be in its grasp.

I don’t believe anything that comes from a hugely popular platform like Carlson’s or Rogan’s or Taibbi’s. I guess you might call this one of my Principles of Digital Epistemology: The bigger the platform, the less trustworthy. The rationale behind it: the Sith lords that control the internet won’t let a platform get big if it tells the truth. Your newsletter will get flagged as junk, the algorithms will beat your site to electronic pulp, Sith allies in the press will lampoon and slander you, and if all that fails, your site will crash due to a digital wardrobe malfunction.

Maybe not, but that’s what my gut kinda tells me.

But whatcha gonna do? Worship Mao with Hasan Piker so we can kill millions of people because Communism has never, you know, really been tried, as evidenced by the fact that our kids can still open a lemonade stand without your hot wife needing to bed Comrade Jabba down at city hall to get the required permit?

No, those evil minions gotta be resisted.

So here’s the thing: even though my instinct tells me there’s something dishonest and propagandistic about Tucker’s Ten Points, I also think Tucker and Co. mean well and are trying to save us from something flat-out evil that sits in the bowels of today’s Left.

So I’m gonna do a little fist pumping, even if it makes me uncomfortable like watching my wife drive to city hall to get that lemonade stand permit.